This weekend we spent time
celebrating beginnings and rejoicing over the journey.
April 29th, Zach’s
cousin got married.
April 30th would
have been my grandparents (Nana and Pawpaw) 62nd wedding
anniversary.
And today, May 2nd
is Zach’s grandparents (Mommom and Pop) 65th wedding anniversary.
A few years ago, Mommom was
in the hospital and everyone was there,
her kids, grandkids, great grandkids and of course her beloved
Pop.
During that time, she said
something to all of us who were holding back tears,
words that I will never
forget.
With a smile on her face as
she held one of her daughter’s hands,
she said,
‘I have had the most blessed
life.
I have seen all of my children grow up and have all of these grandkids
and great grandkids around me.
And I have spent a lifetime with the love of my
life.’
This weekend brought the most
beautiful contrast.
Two individuals committing to
each other and taking the first step into day one of their journey, and the
other looking on and reflecting on the past sixty five years together.
One looks ahead into their
future and the other looks around at the life they have built together.
Watching Mommom and Pop dance
together at the wedding, one of our cousins said to me ‘Can you imagine what
all they have seen and what all they have been through together?’
It’s such a great question.
Marriage is the most
difficult and at the same time, the most beautiful thing to be apart of.
Living life as one with another human being puts you in
a vulnerable state.
It gives that person the
power to hurt you more than anyone else can hurt you.
But also opens you up to
experiencing love, in ways that you have never experienced before.
Both will happen.
We have committed to
choose, for the amazing to outweigh the shitty.
I love hearing stories about
my Nana and Pawpaw.
They were passionate.
I relate to that.
One definition of legacy is
‘a thing handed down by
a predecessor.’
The definition tripped me up
because of the word ‘thing’.
In my experience, what is
being handed down to us is not a
thing.
It is love.
Love put into action.
To love hard.
To love with respect.
And to love without judgment.
Though they never had the
chance to meet, the latter is something that Nana and Pawpaw and Mommom and Pop
had in common,
to love without judgment.
My Nana and Pawpaw let anyone
who needed a roof over their head stay with them and ever since the day I met
Mommom and Pop they made me feel like I had always belonged in this family.
I consider it one of the
greatest honors of my life to be the predecessor of families who put loving
God and loving one another,
above all else.
We named our daughter Zizi
Virginia after Mommom, who’s name is Virginia,
and so that she would have the same
initials as my Nana (Zula Vernelle).
Her name is in honor of two
women who we pray, she will be a mixture of.
There will never be a day
in her life where she does not know the legacy they have left for her.
A lifetime of love is what constitutes a blessed life.
-Haley Gay
