If you aren't aware of my resume, during the course of mine and zach's three year relationship, we lived in the same town for three months, the first three months of dating. The rest was endured, physically separate. Now I find myself in a situation that I so intensely longed for. I'm with my husband, I see him everyday, we kiss and hug whenever the hell we want. It's incredible. But in this time of saying goodbye to the miles that separated us, I have entered into a season of all new long distance relationships.
In the time leading up to my wedding day, my family, friends and I, knew that becoming a wife wasn't the only change happening that day. It was goodbye. The day after I said my vows, I headed to the Dominican Republic for a week and then from there, to my new home in virginia.
Just like that, I was gone.
In the midst of pure joy and excitement, came the pain of being away from people so close to my heart. I found myself, once again in the challenge of long distance relationship.
Zach and I apparently beat the odds. During that time, the Lord hid my eyes from the statistics of success, in couples that were apart for so long. It's not good. And I believe it is the same for the rest of the relationships in our lives. Putting miles between you and those that are in your life will teach you a lot.
It will show you who cares about you and who you truly care for. Because distance equals work.
And we aren't used to that. Work.
Before I experienced this perspective, the relationships I most valued in life were the ones that were convenient, with people who were always there. The nature of comfortability and availability in most relationships brings out a certain laziness. So all of the sudden, I am 1300 miles away, convenience is gone and it's time to dig in and pursue relationships in a serious way. That means talking on the phone until 3am because your best friend is feeling rejected and unsure of what to do next. Or having a wine night over facetime. It means calling my mom and checking in with dad. Snapchatting the dumbest things and knowing what is happening in their lives. Covering them in prayer. Sending texts, voicemails and packages just to remind them that they are not forgotten about. These are some examples of what the people in my life have done for me and it is an incredible feeling, to know that you are loved from so far away.
In a lot of ways, being in long distance relationships teaches me about how I should always treat the people in my life. Why does it take being in a different time zone, for me to pursue those I love?
Being apart is painful and can really suck.
We are called to love one another and distance opens up an avenue to obey that calling in so many ways that we never thought before.
But if you are blessed enough to be near the people that you love. Don't take it for granted. Be intentional. Look at someone in your life, who you see all the time and tell them how much they are valued. Send a surprise gift to a friend who brings so much joy to your life, even if they are your next door neighbor! It's not cheesy, it is necessary. Loving one another with passion is how God showed us to love, it is His design.
-hay
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| long distance gift i was blessed with today |
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| living in the fruits of the most difficult time |
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